Oh man, how on earth does this thing work?

Hey hey ladys and lads visiting my page! I don't mean to alarm you but I am a bit of a technical meatsack, hence my ugly colour choice and most likely confusing layout. I apologise but have no real intention of improving. Sorry.

If you were still under the impression that this page was an insight into the life and times of my travels in Chile, that I have to sadly dash your dreams of a hilarious tale of my incompetence- I'm back in NZ baby! However, seeing as I've had such a great response to my blog and since my theripist thinks it's a good way for me to share my thoughts (joke), I am going to continue this blog, most likely in a random fashion, with tales of day to day hilarious misunderstandings, annoyances, and general thoughts from out of the blue.

Enjoy, or don't, its your call.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Your mother is a butt + other tales from Vietnam

Testing, testing...
Is it going to be achievable to write hilarious blog updates from this device (my iPod)?? Answer; yes!

So Ihave just booked flights to Vietnam, which will be leaving in just under 11 weeks!! Needless to say, I am shite-ing myself with excitement! But I'm also shite-ing myself about coming down with the Vietnamese version of "dehli belly" and shite-ing myself for real. Yes, as mentioned  in previous posts, I'm a nervous traveller. However, I'm sure that's an issue that can be dealt with closer to the time.

On to more pressing matters. I decided that if I'm going to go for the 'authentic traveller' (i respect your customs, such a lovely hole in the floor boards!!) not the 'obnoxious westerner' approach ( "you call that a toilet?!"), I'd better brush up on my Vietnamese. My hope is to become so fluent that I will blend in. Once I've convinced the local populous that I am indeed not a foreigner, but infact am an albino native, I shall then experience the real Vietnam. Or so I thought.

Minutes after hatching this cunning plan, I had experienced a vigerous introductory training session, courtesy of vietnameslearnig.com. The lesson had consisted of me trying to pronounce "ma" in six different tones. Not only did I spend 10 minutes in my room sounding like a vaild candidate for the Henry Bennett, but I also had the added pressure of knowing that if I used the wrong tone "ma" in a sentence, I could well end up calling someones mother a rice seedling, or a ghost, or a butt. Talk about pressure!!

Let's practice altogether now! Possible scenario #1

Asian person who I have just met goes to introduce me to his mother who is sweeping the doorway of their small thached hut......and scene...

Him: "Let me introduce you to my Mum".
Me: "Okay".
Him "Chao, ma" (Hello Mum)"
Me " Chao, ma!" (Hello, rice seedling!)
Mum: "uhhhhh....Chao?"

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